Sunday, June 22, 2014

you know what's great

Pretty certain most of my blogposts are depressing these days. I promise you that I'm not depressed. I just seem to be able to write about whatever I want on here and I am pretty sure that no one is reading so I feel free to share. 

Recently I decided to not "get over it", but to be "done with it". As per the advice of a friend that I was chatting with on facebook. He said, "Getting over it means that it can come back. Sometimes you just need to get over something and it's okay if it comes back later, but if you truly don't want something to come back, then you need to be done with it." So I'm done with it. What specifically? Being hurt. Tolerating hurt. Tolerating mean words. Being bullied. Tolerating negativity. Actually, I'm done tolerating people giving me grief about the things I like to do or say. The person that I am. 

I'm Lily Garay. I'm 17. I read my blog posts and book chapters out loud as I'm typing them (even if I'm in panera). I like to put my hair up in a bun and when I'm working out I like to braid it. Sometimes, most of the time, I conduct when I'm running on the treadmill. You know the Tom & Jerry episodes where the conductor directs the orchestra? That's me when I'm running on the treadmill jamming out to my dubstep remix of Oceans by Hillsong. I'm Lily Garay. I believe that I am a mixture of an introvert and an extrovert. If I need to be one of the other, I assume that roll. It can be a good thing, but it can also be a bad thing. I hate shopping. At least that's what I tell people. I actually love to buy stuff. Sue me if I'm not politically correct with my words. I hate the part of shopping where things don't fit me because the chest is too tight and the part that is supposed to hug your hips is way too loose. I dislike the fact that pants fit me perfectly from the waist down to  mid thigh and then get baggy. When I can't find a watch that looks good on my tan arm that has hairs. Hairs I never even bothered to care about until someone pointed them out online. What's so wrong with them anyways? 

You see, the paragraph above is just a short short short short short excerpt of the description of "who I am", but they're the things that make up my personality. I'm a nerd. I get really nervous sometimes. Sometimes I'm really immature. Did I mention that I had A's and B's until senior year. I got D's in my only two academic classes senior year. I was actually on honor roll in tenth grade. I get caught up in my work because I love it. Sometimes it stresses me out, but I love it. I get paid to organize these amazing events and to network with some of the coolest people ever. My little city is perfect. My family is the best. 

I'm done thinking that all of the things that make up me aren't cool. Go ahead and make fun of me. I don't care anymore. One day I'll find the perfect guy for me and he'll accept me for all of this. Until then I'm going to continue trusting in God that He is going to make everything okay and the things that aren't okay, He'll give me peace. 

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